It’s fair enough that we looks like a newlywed couple and we do most of the things what you can expect from a newlywed couple; open affection in public, little giggling grins, hand handling, and lovey eyes. But, you may not be able to see that they are living with each other for more than 7 years and we are very much used to all these things. We are living in the very same manner from the time when we met.

Love and passion are a very important part of our lifestyle and it works well. We are dominant and submissive in the core, but there is a good portion of love in our relations.

It is true that some D/s relationships are not so romantic because the service is more important for them. Having love and romance is not the part of their deal. But, some relationships provide more importance to love as compared to BDSM.

I am familiar with some couples who don’t want to engage love because that reduces the intensity of possible harshness during the play. This is one the reasons why love is not a necessary part of a D/s relationship.

Then, how love work for us? Actually, we keep doing the things we agreed upon, we keep providing our services because love is a part of our relation whether we notice or not. I don’t think that I would be providing my services, having sex, sadomasochism, and all the other stuff with my Dom, if there is no love for him.

In fact, with casual partners (before I met my current Dom), the play was not that interesting, we never had sex and I never serve them in any manner except the BDSM play.

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People often tell you that love can get in the way of service or it can’t allow you or your partner to have an intense play. Yes, it can but if you let it. I can’t put my head down while my Dom is enjoying an intense torture. Is that because of love? Not really. I can’t accept that he can treat me like that if he really loves me. Does it mean that love is coming in the way? No, It is my mind, my thinking process. It is kind of my personal thinking, it is not love that forces me to stop enjoying what my partner likes to enjoy.

To prove this, I thought that can I enjoy the same play with someone else and my mind said, NO. I love him and that is the reason why I tried to bear and enjoy that torture.

Love is something very powerful and it’s here, inside us whether you feel it or not. If you exclude the love from a relationship, I don’t think there is much left in it except a paper contract. Sure, it is my personal experience and speculation, but we all go through some of these feelings. I have seen that people finally admits that love was the thing that made their relationship a successful one.

What are the effects of Love in BDSM?

• Love improves our relationship while making it more strong and flexible.
• Love shows that I am more involved in the relationship and I want it to work more than anything else on the planet
• Love makes it easier to serve your master, making it more enjoyable
• The most important part of love is that it helps us in solving our issues and conflicts where a non-romantic love could just end.

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