When it comes to fear of desertion or abandonment, you might think there is something wrong in the relation but actually it has nothing to do with the relationship. The actual reason of having fear in someone’s mind about being abandoned is related to their past. Actually, people do have fear of abandonment because of their previous experiences with their closed ones including parents, friends, and lover or a partner. The abandonment problem born in babyhood because of carless parenting leaves a long lasting fear in one’s mind. There is no magical trick to vanish internal voices in a quick time, but you can help such person through paying proper attention.

Initially, you need to find out the sources of their sorrows and grief from the past and then try to pay attention to those areas. Having a conversation about such stories also helps in improving the bond of relationship. When you ask your partner to tell a difficult story from their past, you need to show caring attitude towards them. While listening to your partner, try to keep them focused on the events and ask to return if they went to an irrelevant topic. If your partner becomes quiet somewhere in the story, you need to make them keep going through gentle words or push on the back. During the whole conversation, there is nothing much to say except “I am hearing you” or “you are doing great.”

Sometimes you might feel uncomfortable due to your loved one’s grief, but you need to keep in mind that you are trying to help them. In reality, you can’t fix the issue they had in the past but you can only hold their space as they go through their healing procedure. All you need to do is stay patient and keep hope that you will get better at it.

Unfortunately, sometimes relationships do fail, so there is a little risk of being abandoned. When you hear to submissives who have lost their loved doms, it seems to be a painful experience for them, but none of them took that pain for life. The way you can make the possibility of breakup less painful is through spreading your social circle.

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Most of the time, you do have a close friend whom you chat daily and share your Dominant submissive relation journey. If you don’t have such person, you can always get it through looking in your community. It doesn’t matter that your friend is vanilla-involved or in a D/s relationship. Actually, most of the human draw peace through getting approval from their community. So, your close person can advise you regarding your relationship and warn you if there is something wrong with it.

If your relationship is going in the wrong direction, the trusted person whom you chat regularly might come with a solution. And if your relationship breaks down, your confidant can make you feel better through spending extra time with you. They can also offer you guestroom if you are one who can’t spend the night alone as an aftermath of the relationship.